Sure, family is something we are all born into, as last names attest. But when do our children truly become like us? To be clear, I am not speaking of mere behavior or genetics. Rather, my concern is with essence and character. Indeed, how and when are children prepared to bear the standards of the family name?
More on this in a moment.
But here, I digress to confess that through much of the fall, I have been somewhat angry with God. In large part, my frustration relates to the fact that just over two years ago, God clearly led Linda and I to transfer our son, Zack, from one school to another prior to his 10th grade year in high school. After nine years in one environment, however, it was not at all an easy thing for Zack to do, or an easy calling for us, as his parents, to embrace. And since then, Linda and I have dealt often with feelings of self-doubt, regret and guilt (false though it may be). Certainly the maturity “beyond his years” that Zack's displayed throughout this time made such feelings more manageable. Indeed, Zack has made the most of his experience, with rare complaint, and become a man in the process.
So why my unresolved tension?
God never told me why. That is, Why the move? Why the emotional price and pai?, Why (seemingly) so little to show for obedience, etc.? Is there no relief? Is there no reward?
The fact is, I have just never understood the move. Until recently - finally – when God spoke in the middle of a November night, clear as a bell.
He simply said, “Tonight I’m going to tell you why.”
In spite of the hour, I quickly recognized this to be one of “those moments” and immediately God had my attention. He said,
“You and Linda – your passions and life values, your marriage and ministry – are defined by three words: faith, courage and sacrifice. And it’s through the experience at Robinson that I have infused these same traits in him. It’s there that I made Zack a DeYmaz.”
In a moment, my angst was turned to peace and since then, I have not looked back. Yes, there is a God … and I am not Him. Indeed, it is He who is answering our prayers to turn my son into a man, and more than that, into a follower of Christ, part of the family.
So at this moment, I’m sitting by a warm fire, high on a mountain in the log home of my in-laws in Washington State overlooking the beautiful Columbia River Gorge and majestic Mt Hood, just outside of Portland, Oregon. This year, the entire family is gathered here for Christmas … and for one more thing.
In a few days, some of the men of the family – Great Grandpa Dr. Willard Aldrich (99), his son, Dr. Tim Aldrich, Zack’s grandpa, Dr. Warren Brown, and my brother-in-law, Mark Averill – who have all devoted their lives to pastoral ministry and Christian service, will gather to commission Zack in prayer as a right of passage just prior to college. Each will speak to from their own perspective concerning the practical relevance of these traits for a significant life. The, following prayer, I will present Zack with a gift of tribute to mark the moment: his own football jersey from his senior year at Robinson - the one with the name DeYmaz on the back just over the number 7 - framed in a shadow-box. And below the jersey, three words inset …
Faith. Courage. Sacrifice.
Words that define who Zack is. Words that define who we are and what it means to be a DeYmaz.
Mark - What an inspiring story. Thanks for sharing. I'm not sure if you remember me, but you have been a force in my life for many years, from the time my youth group, Destiny, saw you and the band St. John perform in Ibiza, through your inspirational leadership in the same group, to the present as I draw on your experience with your children. (I remember when Zack was born!)
I have been in the Air Force for 16 years and we have moved several times. Sometimes, it's not easy on Shai (my wife) and two girls. Although my calling is not quite the same as yours, Christ is always with us just the same.
I hope you and I can keep in touch. I have been searching for the St. John CD with "I'll Wait on You" and "It's Sad". Any ideas...?
Posted by: Chad Gallant | May 22, 2008 at 12:41 PM
Good to hear from you! Of course, I remember you, Chad; how could I forget?! What do you do for the USAF? The only St John cassette I know if is at my mother's house in AZ! I listened to it a couple of years ago and thought, not bad:-)
Thanks for your service to me and to our country via the military. On this Memorial Day, I'm thinking of you!
Stay on touch through the blog. Do you ever get to Arkansas? M-
Posted by: Mark DeYmaz | May 26, 2008 at 02:49 PM